Limbo

Show me what you feel

And show me what you mean

Show me because sometimes

I put too much into how things seem

Tell me what you know

And tell me what you think

So I don’t have to guess

I make the worst of everything

Prove that you care

Or even that you don’t

One thing I cannot stand 

Is staying in limbo

Forever of the edge

Of maybe, maybe not

The fear of never knowing

If it is, or if not

So won’t you just tell me

What you know and what you think

So I can put an end 

To my constant questioning 

Unattached

You say you can’t

Handle this

Can’t handle me

Because one day

You’ll have to leave

You can’t get attached

For fear of getting stuck

You’re so glad 

We’ve never fucked

You won’t hold my hand

But you’ll kiss me in the dark

Cuddle up until

You’ve got a grip on my heart

I know you say 

You’ll have to leave one day

But what about me

I know you can’t

Get attached

Because of feelings

You might have

Should I sit here

While you make up you mind

Deciding if being with me

Would be fine

Let you waste 

All of my time

I guess that’s fine

You say you want this 

But you don’t know

So maybe it should be me

Who decides if you go

Unnoticed 

There was no fight

Or bitter words

The falling out

Went quite unheard 

The silence came

In a slow diminuendo

Much as it started 

With a quick crescendo 
Never noticed 

As things went

Did not think

I’d lose a friend

Since no fight was had

No bitter words

A quiet end 

Went all unheard 

Stranger I Knew

We treat each other like strangers

A casual hi, hey, hello

Act like we have no idea

About the intimacies we know

I know that I wonder 

The things that you thought

Wonder if you think about me

Still or if not

Not that it matters

It won’t change you or me

Will never make us the we

That neither of us could be

The Broken

Why do I like the broken

I’d try to fix the dead

Why torture myself 

Deep with in my head 

Why do I attract the broken

Like glue they stick to me

All of their problems

Are nothing that I need

Beautiful Soul

She’s got a beautiful soul 

And a broken brain

She’ll drink a bottle

To ease the pain

To blind herself 

From a world of shit

So she can’t see 

How she doesn’t fit

A sensitive heart

So easily broke

Any sadness does

Kill her hope

So tonight she’ll be

Out again

Holding on by her last thread

With a beautiful soul

And a broken brain

An ugly world she can’t face

All she wants 

Is to see the best

A kindness unlike

All the rest

To nice to say

Things that should be said

All the ways she could hurt

Let them drag her through the dirt

All the pain no compromise 

For their gain 

She would die

With no idea of self worth 

All she acquires is hurt

She’ll let them use her

Abuse her

Even if they won’t choose her

Her kindness is so naive

Gives herself no space to breath

So tonight she’ll be out again

Holding on by her last thread

A beautiful soul

A broken brain

An ugly world 

She can’t face

Hit and Run

Always looking for the better
So I ignore the best
So afraid to settle
That I’ll never rest
No matter what I’m given
It’s alway second best
I’m so afraid of happiness
It’s what I’ll never get


I tear myself apart
Both inside and out
I hate myself enough
For everyone else
If you give a complement
I’ll laugh and say no way
Because I do know the truth
At the end of the day
You all see the shell
The hair and make up done
But inside its like a hit and run

This Side.

I keep a cool front.

I’m clam, level headed.

In control.

Issues? None.

I’m

In

Control

But I don’t know.

I don’t.

I know

I’m failing

Falling

It’s all pretend.

Don’t want to be me.

Or be my friend.

Psychotic

Fucked up

Terrible, mean

and that’s just the one side of me.

See?

Suppression

Repression

I’ll try anything

Please,

Just help me

hide

This side of me.

Never Know

I know who you are

I know what that means

I know you don’t know

A single thing

It breaks my heart

Makes me Bleed

A lie kept for

The ‘good’ of things

I found you there

In plain sight

But you don’t know

Can’t ruin your life

It feels like I’m losing

This god damn fight

But I can’t say

Can’t reach out

Keep it all pent up

Inside myself

I know who you are

I know what that mean

I know I’ll never know you

You’ll never know me

The Tyrant Inside

How wrong it is

How wrong it should be

That I have this insistent need

To change all that comes

So very naturally to me

It scares me more than anything

That’s not who I want to be

Anything that’s like you

Every sign, every need

Every look in the mirror

It’s not me that I see

It’s you

Trapped inside

Trying to get out

I push you down

For no one to find

But I know it’s there

I feel it all the time

Like a vicious tyrant

It controls everything

It takes control of me